caught in a storm

I hate this. Today I am having major internal emotional issues. I am just beside myself with moodiness and emotions. The boys all took off to go to the pumpkin patch today. It's killing me. I love Halloween. I love the pumpkins, the hayrides, the scarecrows, the goodies, the cornmazes......everything. Here I am lying in bed missing it all feeling sorry for myself. I'm wallowing in self pity because I couldn't go and I don't get to see the excitement on my boys' faces as they run around trying to pick out the perfect pumpkin. And despite asking him three times to please take the camera and take some pictures for me do you think he did? No, of course not. I may not be the best at remembering to take pictures but this was important to me. I know he's having to do so much more than usual but it was a small request. I just wanted a few pictures of this year to feel like I got to participate even from afar. Everyday is becoming more and more of a challenge to stay positive and see the end of the road. I'm frustrated and tried of laying here. All I get to do is lay, drink, pee and repeat. At least if I was able to indulge in a bowl of ice cream now and then it would be a bit more tolerable, but no. Since I'm on my new diet it's a definate no no. I know we only have 14 more days but the last 5 have felt like 50 and I'm struggling. I know as with everything, this to shall pass. However, I just need to complain once in a while to get the emotional tide away from me. So until my next rant.............